Today was a pretty cool day. Sal’s 102nd day party. But when I write about that, I wanna have more pictures. And we didn’t pack the camera->computer cables. So those will come next week sometime.
So I’ll skip ahead to tonight, driving around, I got to enjoy what I like the most about visiting LA. 97.1 – talk radio. We usually listen to Tom Leykis for some reason – and he’s really fun – I won’t go into the details though. He just is. Clicking on the link pretty much explains it. But tonight we’re just listening to Gary and Gretchen, who aren’t listed on their website – but they started talking about a couple of topics. And well, I called into my first radio show tonight.
The topic started out as tattoos. But we didn’t catch that. By the time we were listening, they were on to the social issues surrounding paying for dinner bills. One thing that I hadn’t heard of, but Gary was saying was pretty standard, was that if one couple invites another couple out to dinner, it can be assumed that the inviting couple would pay. I don’t know if that exists in my circles, but it was an interesting idea. I wonder if I’ve offended any couples. Over paying bills.
So I call in. The screener asks for my 10 second spiel. “I agree with Gary – it all works out in the end. So we just have everyone throw their credit cards in and let the waiter pick.” He says – “So it’s a swinging dick contest?”
“No, not really. Just let luck decide.”
“Okay – hold on.”
And 17 minutes later (cell phone tells me how long I’m connected) I get on. I’ve been working through some of the lines I want to say – I’d like to talk about how we guess numbers on a dollar bill to find out who wins the honor of paying the bill, but that’s too hard to explain. Go with the old “let the waiter decide” strategy. Will give us the chance to talk about how it makes the waiter a bit nervous, because he’s upset the bill payer right before the tip is gonna get paid.
I think about the tattoos too – mentally rehearsing my lines about how I got one 2 months ago cause my son was born…and 15 years ago cause I was into ants and how they’re an analogy for the brain. 7 years ago I got my wife’s name on me, but she wasn’t my wife at the time. And a flower a couple years before that representing childhood creativity with a college buddy (who’s a superstar!). I figure I’ve got a good spiel.
And while I’m on hold they’re adding a 3rd topic – what you use to judge people. Gretchen’s talking about how she drives a 91 Acura and its a great car, but she gets judged by it all time. I’m think I can mix some Corvette mid-life crisis judgements while I’m currently in a Volvo that can barely fit all the gear for a 3 month old…but not really sure how it’ll all come together. But I feel I’ve got the fuel.
So after one of the longer commercial breaks I’ve paid attention to (two ads for the Martha Behind Bars tv music) I get on. SHOWTIME!
I make sure to kiss up to Gary immediately. Because I figure I can get more airtime that way. Gary likes our style of letting the waiter decide, cause if you just say “You get it next time” or something like that, it’s hard to keep track of who’s turn it is. Let an outside party decide. But Gretchen’s still concerned about the people that can’t afford always gambling about dinner. “Well, we just hope that when it all works out in the end, the rich guys get tagged a couple extra times.” Gary agrees. I’m pumped. Flowing. Okay. We’ll probably move on to the tattoos now.
But there’s silence. So I figure, I’ll take the bull by the horns. I offer to move on to the tattoos. I give a little intro. A shout out to Sal (there are some pretty amusing photos from today – tune back soon). And then just more silence. My tattoo intro wasn’t as good as I would have liked, but I had panicked. More silence. Check the phone – disconnected. NO!
Turn the radio up. They have like a 5 or 7 second delay. “
And that was it. I was pumped, but wanted more. So much more. Catherine said my loud grunts of frustration were waking Sal up. She also called me a freak. She also pointed out that they were calling me Mike. She also said (she had a lot to say, for not being on a talk radio show…) I could blog about it to release some of my energy – I was pumped up. I was probably sweating. Without the probably.
I’m still not quite over the experience. I think I could get addicted to calling into talk radio. Maybe addicted enough to call into the Phil Hendrie show one day. One day…
It has been a fun day.?Loving you has been in my head all day too. Extra fun. I even got Catherine humming it as she was changing Sal into his bear sleeper that Cammy got him (can’t find it on their site). That thing is the best. I need to commission them to make an adult size. Or I need to calculate how many 6-12 month old sizes I need to buy to get the material to make an XXL version. Sal of course, was changing out of his “Born to Sk8” shirt. See – we need pictures.
Good night.